Its been a big week in professional wrestling as both ROH and TNA had respective PPVs. TNA’s Sacrifice wasn’t a bad show and it had a very well worked match between one Bully Ray and Austin Aries, two of the company’s top rising, if a little late out of the gate, stars. What’s more ROH has crowned a new world champion in the form of Kevin Steen, something that I am personally pleased by. If by this time next year ROH sort out their technical issues the company could really go places and I might be able to feature them on the chart more, for now it is a little difficult timing wise to get the shows and even when I do an hour a week does little favours to the company’s top heels. Slowly but surely though, and in the meantime you should probably check out Kevin Steen as aside from Daniel Bryan he is pretty much the best heel out their in professional wrestling today, and it could be argued that he is the best. But enough of this pointless promotion of people who aren’t on the chart, let’s get on with the report…
Weekly Top Ten:
1st Place: Robert Roode (10/10)
After facing off against RVD in a match that favoured the challenger, Robert Roode still stood tall at Sacrifice. I’m still not completely satisfied with Roode’s victory as for the most part it came from RVD’s slipping up rather than his own actions and while that might have been fine on its own it adds the list of PPV matches where Roode didn’t win but more lucked out and won by technicality. In fact Roode hasn’t even attempted to use a finisher in a PPV title match for some time, which is just plain weird really. So Roode is still the champion and he will most likely beat AJ Style’s record, but could he have looked much better while doing it? Absolutely.
2nd Place: Gail Kim (9/10)
The Knock-Outs champ retained against the next in a long line of miscellaneous women who somehow managed to beat her on Impact but couldn’t get the job done on PPV. I suppose you could chalk this up to Gail Kim being a big game player and someone who only brings their A-Game on the grand stage. Or it could be that those backstage at Impact can’t be bothered to establish a real feud between her and her opponent but also don’t really see the point in having the title change hands with any of the current talent so every month she has just been handed a different random Knock-Out to do battle with. Next up it should be Winter or something I suppose.
3rd Place: Christopher Daniels & Kazarian (8/10)
A surprising win for the new tag team champions. I am a little disappointed that nothing happened this week on Impact between the two teams. Instead of keeping up their feud they decided to continue this pointless angle with AJ Styles that is going to lead to nothing. A rivalry between Joe & Magnus and Daniels & Kazarian could be a good thing, even if the teams aren’t exactly the most established teams ever, but it seems like TNA aren’t going to be going that way.
4th Place: Daniel Bryan (7/10)
Bryan got a win and a loss this week but he did his usual heelistic deeds and that gets him ahead of any other heel in the WWE right now. Bryan has been consistent since his title win and heel turn and as long as his increasing popularity doesn’t actually turn him face at any point soon I would expect him to steal the chart this year. Although it is early days yet and as we have seen with guys like the Miz, being on top one minute doesn’t guarantee that you be the next. Still with the Yes! (and No!) chants getting all the louder you can’t help but think that things are only just beginning .
5th Place: Bully Ray (6/10)
He might have lost against Austin Aries at Sacrifice but he won where it counts, to possibly get a shot at the TNA world title next week. Bully Ray has been developing nicely as a heel over the past twelve months and I could see him having a Mark Henry-esque title run in a few months after the whole Roode-Storm saga has been resolved. After putting on what was arguably the best match on the Sacrifice card, Bully Ray deserves some type of push, I’m just surprised that Austin Aries isn’t going into the title hunt at the same time.
6th Place: John Laurinaitis (5/10)
Big Johnny flexed his muscles again this week in one of the most painfully long segments in Raw history. A GM firing the Big Show is one thing, its happened before after all, but that time he got chokeslammed off a ledge, now instead we get the World’s Largest Athlete blubbering like a baby in the middle of the ring. At this point you have to pray that Show will get involved in the Laurinaitis-Cena match or that whole thing just seemed pointless. I reckon that Lesnar was scheduled to interfere in the match but developments with Triple H and last minute booking have meant they are going to keep him off the PPV and fill his role with the Big Show instead, either that or they reckon they need interference from both men to justifiably take the Super Cena down.
7th Place: Kane (4/10)
The Big Red Machine went a little crazy this week, attacking C.M. Punk after their match thanks to some chicanery on behalf of Daniel Bryan. If all it takes for Kane to step up his game is a cheeky chair shot then maybe he should get his opponent to give one to him in each match since he certainly needs something to put some pep back in his step, having spent most of his return jobbing to the company’s two top faces.
8th Place: Crimson (3/10)
The Undefeated One got another win at Sacrifice, albeit one slightly handed to him. Of course he lost in the battle royal on Impact, but I’m led to believe that those losses don’t count. I’m glad that the guy who was introduced as simply being Amazing Red’s little brother is finally getting a personality, even if it is perhaps too late to make him a main event player any time soon.
9th Place: Damien Sandow (2/10)
Once again the Educator of the Unwashed Masses refuses to actually step in the ring with an opponent who is beneath him. Well at least until the guy’s back is turned and then he lays the smackdown on him, as any clever heel would. I like that he is being booked as a guy who can lose his temper in the ring as that adds a new dynamic to his arrogant persona and reflects a hypocrisy inherent in those who make a meal out of acting composed and controlled. Having said that I am looking forward to the guy actually having a match at some point soon, the only problem is that with such a limited face talent pool the WWE are going to have a hard time finding someone for him to dace who is at his level or who won’t simply destroy him because they are so beyond it…hmm, Ryder?
10th Place: Lord Tensi (1/10)
Tensi had quite a downgrade this week from being in the main event of Raw to just having a squash match on Superstars against Tyson Kidd. It’s surprising that Tensi, for all the hype, still hasn’t been booked for a PPV match. I still don’t get why the WWE don’t just turn Miz face, have him lash out against Laurinaitis for not giving him enough credit for the Wrestlemania win and put him against Tensi in what I think could be quite an interesting match up, and it would have given the two something to do for this PPV.
2012-2013 Season Top Ten: Overall Top Ten:
1st Place: Daniel Bryan (60/70) – 1st Place: The Miz (790/1590)
2nd Place: Chris Jericho (43/70) – 2nd Place: Chris Jericho (693/1590)
3rd Place: Robert Roode (29/70) – 3rd Place: C.M. Punk (666/1590)
5th Place: Alberto Del Rio (26/70) – 5th Place: Dolph Ziggler (443/1590)
6th Place: John Laurinaitis (25/70) – 6th Place: Jack Swagger (421/1590)
7th Place: Lord Tensi (25/70) – 7th Place: Alberto Del Rio (421/1590)
8th Place: Kane (22/70) – 8th Place: Wade Barrett (395/1590)
9th Place: Bully Ray (21/70) – 9th Place: Sheamus (294/1590)
10th Place: Gail Kim (17/70) – 10th Place: Mark Henry (254/1590)
(Heel Hall of Fame)
**Heel Report 2010-2011 Winner: The Miz**
**Heel Report 2011-2012 Winner: Cody Rhodes**
The Face-Off: Cheesy John Cena
After having witnessed John Cena’s latest promo this week I thought I’d devote this space to dissecting exactly why John Cena continues to be a burden to professional wrestling. First let’s get the unpleasantness out the way and say that Cena is a great guy for his charity work and it is a shame that he is going through a divorce, and that he gives his all to the company. I know these things are true, but I honestly don’t see how that is any different from any guy who would be put in the same position. If you are the top face in a child-focused company you are probably going to do a ton of make-a-wishes unless you are a complete douche. I’m pretty sure that anyone put in Cena’s position would have the same accolades to speak of and therefore I don’t think you can excuse the style in which he goes about his job by appealing to these things.
That being said I have to question why the WWE continues to see Cena as ‘The Man’ when a huge portion of the audience still hate him and he continues to pedal out the same weak crap that he has been shoving for nearly a decade. Over the past year he has had monumental feuds with C.M. Punk and the Rock, and yet while he stepped up his game somewhat for those big matches, he continues to be his lame old self for the most part.
The rushed feud between Laurinaitis and Cena is already questionable enough when you have the husky voiced wonder acting like a jumped up version of Mr. Mcmahon with half the power. But then here comes Super-Cena to legitimise things by using an Ace Ventura phrasing of ‘Loser’ about a hundred times, a reference that is now about 20 YEARS OLD, way to connect with your target audience John! The sheer cheesiness of John Cena’s promos are staggering, when he tries to be comical he comes across flat and phoney, and when he then does his little ‘now I’m switching to be serious’ voice he sounds laughable and insincere. Basically he is only believable to people who either don’t care or have the mental age of an eight year old.
Now sure that might be the WWE’s target audience right now, but in part I feel like that is in part due to Cena’s presence in the first place, they knew they couldn’t market him to anyone else. But also the facts are that this audience would eat up the tripe that anyone fed them and so Cena’s position and status is superfluous and simply based around the fact that he is the recognisable face. If something happened and lord forbid Cena got a career ending Edge-like injury, within a few weeks the WWE would have another face and things would roll on as normal.
What I am trying to get at here is that Cena himself is not required for his role to be filled and therefore you could easily get someone else to play the cheesy face, perhaps someone with a little more in-ring talent and someone who brought their A-game a little more often when it comes to match and promo performance. While Cena shows up every day it seems like he is going through the same old motions with his promos and in his matches. There is a reason that crowds can often be found chanting ‘Same Old Shit’ to him. And it’s not like you can say that he is forced into this position by creative since Cena is at the position now where he can deliver a promo at the end of a PPV that completely undermines the company’s plans and get away with it. If he wanted his character to be a little more edgy or interesting it would happen. But in the end Cena is a simple man with simple ‘meat and potatoes’ taste. He isn’t capable of thinking outside the box and being creative, all he can do is occasionally lift things and spout out the same tired messages week after week. Lord help us when he tries to be funny because things like this week’s promo happen. Sure other guys might be hit and miss and you can’t always deliver, but Cena barely ever cracks out anything interesting from his repertoire and when he does it is almost instantly forgotten the next week and we go back to the same old black-and-white-and-yet-somehow-rainbow-coloured superhero from the stale old comics of yester-year.
But maybe I’m wrong, maybe it is this predictable cheesiness that has made Cena last for such a long time. But if that is the case then I honestly can say I don’t want to live in a world where these generic messages of dullness are being cast and received by a mass of accepting simpletons that are happy with mediocre and think that saying someone has ‘heart’ and ‘gives it their all’ justifies them being shit and yet still being the face of a multi-million, international entertainment company, which is unique in its programming but needs all the help it can get looking respectable and not like a joke all the time, and having this clown at the head of it doing lame old Jim Carey impersonations is doing far more harm than good!
That’s all for this week, I’m not expecting the world from Over the Limit but hopefully Punk and Bryan will get more than 18 seconds and I’m pretty sure the WWE aren’t short-sighted enough to destroy all the work that they have been doing with Big Johnny just to have him fired now so I’ll be expecting him to prevail in some way. It is a good thing that WWE has this PPV so soon after Sacrifice as well since otherwise they might find themselves out in the cold on the chart for a second week in a row, as it is we will probably have a WWE-heel landslide next week, but we will just have to wait and see. For now this is James Wright signing off.
Category: Columns and Editorials |